Yesterday's Feelings
by Blue421
Summary: "She stood still, barely breathing, with her hand still on his leg and watched as he tried to breathe through the pain."  Kadam oneshot that takes place right after Dead and Gone Part II.  COMPLETE


**Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi.**

Title is taken from the song _**Yesterday's Feelings**_ by **The Used**

_Now all those feelings, those yesterdays feelings will all be lost in time_

_Left the only worries I had in my hands_  
><em> Away from the light in my eyes<em>  
><em> Holding tight and try not to hide how I feel<em>

* * *

><p>Adam sighed in frustration and turned his head to glare at the annoying machine that sat next to his bed. He was trying to sleep but the machine wouldn't stop beeping. He looked down at the monitor that was clipped onto his finger and thought briefly about pulling it off. He knew that action would get him in trouble but he was so tired. The bed below him was terribly uncomfortable and he thought longingly of his bed at home. Adam shifted but immediately regretted his decision. Pain tore through his shoulder and it managed to steal his breath away. Adam squeezed his eyes shut and attempted to catch his breath again.<p>

"Bad move. Bad move." Adam whispered through gritted teeth. He kept his eyes shut and took a deep breath in through his nose. He held his breath as he waited for the pain to disappear. When it finally did, he opened his eyes only to be startled by the girl lingering in his doorway. The shock of the situation caused Adam to jump which once again made pain rip through his shoulder.

"Shit!" Adam cried as he touched his bandaged shoulder lightly.

"I'm so sorry!" She panicked and crossed the room quickly. She placed a hand on his leg and asked, "Is there anything I can do?"

Adam held up his hand and shook his head. "Just give me a minute." Adam gasped out and closed his eyes.

She stood still, barely breathing, with her hand still on his leg and watched as he tried to breathe through the pain. His eyebrows were pulled together and his jaw was clenched tight. His left hand was balled into a fist and his right hand still rested lightly on his shoulder. After a few deep breaths, Adam opened his eyes slowly and motioned for her to sit in the chair next to his bed. She nodded, slipped her bag off her shoulder, and set it on the floor as she lowered herself into the chair. She placed her hands in her lap and Adam turned his head to look at her. He was startled when he noticed that she had tears in her eyes.

"Katie, what's wrong?" Adam attempted to turn his body more towards her but stopped when he felt his shoulder pull. Katie watched as he struggled to get situated and the look of pain that flashed across his face made a few of the tears that had pooled in her eyes to spill over and race down her cheeks. She leaned forward and grabbed Adam's hand, an act which completely took him by surprise. He looked down at their tangled fingers and back to her tear stained face.

"I was worried about you." Katie replied softly. "You could have bled out right in front of my eyes. I thought you were going to." The tears flowed freely now.

"Hey, but I didn't. I'm right here. I'm okay. Please stop crying." He pled and squeezed her hand.

"But you're hurt! Seeing you in so much pain hurts me, Adam." She whispered and began absentmindedly running her thumb along the back of his hand.

Adam cocked his head to the side and opened his mouth to speak. Before he spoke, he glanced down at their hands and watched as Katie's thumb moved quickly across his skin.

"I'm confused." He replied honestly while looking back up to meet her hesitant gaze.

"I…well…I…like you." She stuttered and shifted in her chair. Adam noticed that a light blush crept across her cheeks as she spoke the words.

"I know. I would hope you would since we're friends and all."

"No, Adam. I mean I _like you_, like you." She choked out nervously and reached up to sweep Adam's hair off his forehead with her free hand. Adam closed his eyes when her hand made contact with his skin but they quickly snapped open once her words fully sank in.

"Wait, you like me?" Katie nodded. "Why?" Adam's tone caused Katie to sit back and pull her hand free from Adam's.

"Oh god, I'm so stupid!" She cried as she stood from the chair. "Of course you wouldn't see me that way. Not after what happened between us the first time around." She quickly began pacing next to the bed. Adam followed her movements with wide eyes. "I should have known you wouldn't have forgiven me yet. Forget I was here. Forget I said anything." She stooped to pick up her bag so she could flee the room but Adam reached out and grabbed her arm, preventing her from doing so.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Would you take a breath and sit down?" Katie bit her lip and glanced back at the door that meant her escape. Adam tightened his grip on her arm which made her turn back to him. "Please, Katie? Let me explain." He pled and nodded toward the chair as he released his grip on her arm.

She took a deep breath and finally placed her bag back on the floor and sat down. Adam immediately reached for her hand and frowned slightly when she hesitated. Once her hand was in his, Adam began talking.

"You're not stupid, Katie. So far from it actually. You're smart, driven, dedicated, and incredibly skilled medically." He said with a laugh as he raised their clasped hands to motion towards his bandaged shoulder. "You're brave, a great friend, easy to talk to, talented. Beautiful." Her head rose at his last word. His stare was so serious and so intense that it caused Katie to blush.

"You think so?"

"Especially when you do that." He admitted, referring to the way she bit her lip when she was nervous.

"Then why did you look at me like what I said was the worst thing you had ever heard?" She went back to tracing the back of his hand with her thumb.

"You're dating my brother. And the last time we tried this you made it pretty clear we were just friends."

"Used to date your brother." Katie whispered and focused on the patterns she was tracing on his hand.

"What?"

"I said, 'used to date your brother'. We broke up."

"When?"

"Yesterday." Katie shrugged.

"Yesterday? I saw him this morning and he didn't say anything about it."

Katie sighed. "That's not surprising." Adam raised an eyebrow at her comment. "He didn't seem too torn up when I told him I wanted to end things. I think he was…relieved." Katie's eyes began to glisten and Adam squeezed her hand.

"No. Don't. Not again. You say it hurts you to see me here and all bandaged, well I don't like to see you cry. You meant a lot to Drew, I know you did. He's been through a lot this year. I don't think he knows what he wants." Adam smiled at her and hoped his words were somewhat comforting. They sat in silence for a few moments before Adam realized that there was still an explanation he needed to hear from Katie.

"So…we talked about the Drew situation but that still doesn't change the fact that you just wanted to be friends before."

"That was before. This is now."

"Katie, come on. You can be honest with me. Tell me what you're thinking."

"I don't know!" She cried as she pulled her hand free and stood up so quickly she almost knocked the chair over backwards. "I'm so confused, Adam! When we first started spending time together I did see you as just a friend. I started to develop feelings for you but then things got intense. I don't have a lot of experience with guys and Adam; you started talking about going to college together. You talked about changing your body physically because of me. I got scared! That day you asked me out at my locker and I said no, you didn't let me finish. I was going to explain why I couldn't go. Things were moving too fast. I panicked and I'm sorry about that." She sat back down but did not reach for Adam's hand. Instead, she ran her palms along her jeans. Adam watched her actions and began shaking his head.

"I will admit that I got a bit too overexcited and enthusiastic about everything too quickly, but here's something I don't understand. If you say that I took things too fast, then how come you started dating Drew so soon after we didn't work out?" Adam tried to keep the hurt from his voice but the look Katie gave him made it obvious that he had not succeeded.

"I wish I had an answer for you. I told you. I was confused. I'm _still_ confused. That doesn't mean what Drew and I had meant nothing to me, but I had no idea what I was doing. I still don't." She replied honestly.

Adam remained silent as he took in her words. He was confused too and also had no idea what to do, but he couldn't push the happiness he felt aside. This was what he had wanted. This was what he had been waiting to hear. Here Katie was reciprocating his feelings. He had to fight the small smile that began to stretch across his lips. But then a thought ran through his mind that stopped the smile immediately. Everything was so complicated now. She was Katie, her brother's ex-girlfriend. She was off limits according to some stupid, unwritten code. But Adam had liked her first. Could he use that? He looked up from his lap to see Katie staring at him with a curious look on her face.

"Can I just ask you one thing?" Katie nodded. "Why now? Why do you suddenly like me now?"

Katie sighed and placed her hand on Adam's leg. "I told you. Seeing you hurt, watching you bleed that much made me realize that I still have feelings for you. Strong feelings. I never really stopped caring about you. I know this is all so cliché. You're lying in a hospital bed and here I am confessing my feelings for you. I'm sure you're questioning if I'm going to change my mind in a week and I can tell you that I won't. The feelings have always been there but I was too afraid to let you see them. I'm not anymore. Life's too short. I want to be with you, Adam. I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you."

Adam grabbed her hand and pulled her from her seat and closer to him.

"I want to be with you too but I have to talk to Drew first. You said he seemed indifferent but I have to ask him how he feels about you and me. If he's okay with it then we'll take things slowly. I want you to be comfortable."

Katie smiled and leaned down to press her lips against his cheek and then rested her forehead against his.

"I like the sound of that."


End file.
